ahh, pos malaysia, so thats how he heard me. He was probably having a torrid affair with the company receptionist in the stairwell and thought it was her, as I had many times heard her singing to herself ‘Wait a minute Mr Postman!’ He helped me up and I took the opportunity to grab his mail bag and…run away with it, wanting to read the mail illegally, thereby giving me some excitement in my life. When the postman finally stopped chasing me, I slowed down, managed to find a rather empty Starbucks cafe and walked in with the mail bag. After ordering my favourite latte, I sat down in bliss by the window to read clandestinely. But what happened when I opened the first letter was so unexpected that I gave up reading. I just left the bag of letters on the floor where I had put it down earlier, my mug of steaming latte still on the table, I just walked quietly out to the terrace of Starbucks. I took out my cellphone again and hesitantly dialled the number of the fire brigade. I told them that a very irritating round person was wedged btwn the elevators at my office and that I was responsible. I hung up before saying who ‘I’ was. I then realized I would be a fugitive so I bought a black catsuit and decided to call myself Pussy-in-Boots and fight crime and rid the world of round ones. My first job…was to find the round one who had written a letter to her friend to say that she had seen the entire elevator incident and that she was going to report me to the police.
I went back into Starbucks, grabbed the mail bag and latte and ran out into the street. One of the Starbucks waiters began to chase me down the street and realizing he wanted the Starbucks mug back, I quickly threw the whole mug at him, making sure the coffee spilt all over his t-shirt and apron. He turned red as he suspiciously looked at the mail bag in my hand, at that moment it got me thinking that the letter I just read could not have possibly been written by the round one as she was probably still stuck in middle of the elevator doors and given the string of incidences that got her on the floor, she would probably be having a concussion right now. I noticed the stunned waiter was picking glass shards to stab me with but I moved back and he slipped on the spilt coffee onto the other glass pieces on floor, cutting himself badly. I took this opportunity to run away with the mail bag to check if the round one, who had been cut in half by the elevator could have a concussion much less write a letter. I found she was gone! Her friend, the short, dark, ugly one had sewn her back together. I could barely imagine what hijinx a round one and an ugly one could get up to. I needed to find the Dreaded Duo. I whipped out my cell phone and called the blinking one …to ask her where the Dreaded Duo could be. But all the blinking one could say was that I was missing from the office at a time when there was too much work! Giving up on explaining to the blinking one that I could be sent to jail for murder if I came back to the office, I slammed the phone down and giving my Pussy-In-Boots outfit a pat, proceeded to hail a cab. "Taman Tun please" I said as soon as I sat at the backseat. The horrified look on the cabby's face actually made me smile, as I could imagine what was going through his head when he saw a barely five feet tall women clad in some ridiculous black leather at this hour of the day pretending to play cat-woman. I was half concerned he may not be able to control his ‘urges’ and may rape me as is frequently the case in our town but then realized he may wear himself out just trying to get the tight suit off. He dropped me off at Taman Tun but I then realized I was in the completely opposite direction of where the Round One actually lived. I figured I should get something to eat at a mamak before I journeyed again. At the mamak, I spotted the Ugly one! She was…
Its not over till...
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